Posts

Hurricane

 Almost exactly a year since my last post Seems like a recurring theme.. Akan ada satu event yang membuatkan I itching to pour my soul out through writing. It really helps. You just needed an outlet sometimes. I wanted to draw, but unfortunately since I tengah dekat temporary place (been moving about) and all my stuff dekat storage company, so tak dapatlah nk melukis.  I think, nowadays, human connection is very scarce because we are all becoming more and more individualistic. Things that are happening in palestine proves this.... Anyway, somehow the consultant in the ward was pissed at me today. Maybe I was just the mangsa keadaan. Tbh, I did nothing wrong. In fact, I did everything right but I guess, that's just the nature of this job isnt it. It is a thankless job. So you just do what you can and I think, it is a good thing that aku ni Muslim because I always make sure that I kerja ni, sebagai satu ibadah. I make sure that I come to work with the sole intention of pleasing ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Future ....2....?

 Hi,  Ive returned after a couple of years since my last entry. Having read it, I rasa bersyukur that I wrote everything down. I've matured since then, I think. I can clearly see, the teenaged / early adult side of me for which I have grown to become a full fledged adult with responsibilities now and clearly, much more difficult decision to make And, one thing for sure.. I've lost the ability to write...... T_T Obviously, the tittle somewhat is giving a hint of what Im about to write. Funny.....Four years ago punya contemplation, still the same this time around. Hidup ni, dunia ni, memang satu roda.  Turns out, I did decide to stay in Msia at the time, for at least another year post-fifth year or let's say..after graduation.  What happened since then?  Alhamdulillah, I graduated. Finished medschool without any repeat on exams. Soared through all of them with blessings from allah, doa & support from parents & family, and of course, my friends. Study group...
Post a Comment
Read more

Future...?

 Salam... Been contemplating about this a lot. And I just....i needed an outlet to vent out my feelings... Also, so that in the future, when I read back on this post, I will know and hopefully smile upon reading back what I felt right at this moment and what madness is going through my little mind.  Sekarang ni, saya pelajar medik tahun 5 dah.. 5 weeks in. And, tengah dalam proses untuk samada apply internship di Ireland (fee €200).... atau patutkah saya buat Housemanship (foc- but may suffer a bit) di Malaysia dahulu.. lepas tu baru fikir untuk ke luar semula demi menuntut ilmu dan reap the benefits over there before coming back here again to benefit my nations. Untuk apply for UKFYP (albeit free) dah terlepas application stage 1.. a bit menyesal, sbb tak aware dengan recruitment date tapi tkpelah, that means, it is not meant for me.. My contemplation stems from: - if terus buat internship overseas, I better stay there until dah dapat specialist / at least 10yrs experience be...
Post a Comment
Read more

Reflections as a third year medic

Hey guys, so um, been a long time. But, uh, this is actually one of my surgery rotations assignments however, as i read, i thought, it would be great if I could pen it down in my blog as well... Just leave a comment (or ask mr google) if there are any terms that u cant understand ok!           One of the many things that I learned was that, a really good grasp of basic knowledge is quintessential for me to be competent. I am still lacking in this which I found very depressing especially when active participation during case discussion with our tutor came in. In order to improve, I really need to consistently do revision, assessment and do verbal discussion with my friends. However, I sometimes find it a bit overwhelming.             Along my rotation, I realised the importance of practice. My tutors and seniors kept repeating this advice time and time again and I find myself agreeing to thi...
Post a Comment
Read more

Travel: Knowledge & Reflection

Hi there. This is a draft. Not yet finished. Just writing it down here so that I will come back later and know that I have an unfinished business when it comes to my blog. Travelled for the winter to Morocco & Spain. ON the hotter side of the world. Not the freezing cold weather ie Austria, Prague, Zakopane, Poland, Iceland. 16Dec-3Jan Learnt a lot No more travel w first time friend. Gonna choose those who I'm already familiar with. Those who knows each other's flaws and work our way around it. Loved the trip nonetheless. Work on self. Quite ill-tempered. Didn't know that it resurfaced again after almost two years wiping out this side of me. Learnt that, I should work on being both kind and right. But, kind must always comes first. Say nice words, or say none at all. Learnt to look from my friend's perspective. Learnt that, other people are also trying their best to make things work, not just you. Friends are actually nice. But, remember, there's nothin...
Post a Comment
Read more
Dear Diary, While I’m writing this, I am sitting on my bed in Shahrizan Inn, Kuantan, Pahang. 4 th day away from Home. Spent 3 days in KL, cz I had my volunteering activities done for the Summer. That, will be in another entry. So, the reason I am writing is because, I feel like my dad, might know when he’s leaving us. All the things that he now does, is as if, as a final goodbye to everyone who knows or knew him. It felt like Ji Hyun from 49 Days. I don’t know if he’s only acting on impulse, or was actually planning it, but this is like the very first time that, when we went to KL, he was so determined on having a reunion with his UPM colleagues. KL done, now that’s why we are here in Kuantan. Cz apparently, some of his friends live here, and he is so eager to meet them. You know how he is, very authoritative.    Already met them just now. While my mum was devastated and frustrated, cz it felt like, we were not properly celebrated as tetamu by them, it still fe...
Post a Comment
Read more
Hi there.  Its been awhile since my last blog update. How are y’all been doing? Still breathing? Alhamdulillah.. Going through rough times? Hmm just keep movin. Cry… Get help. Mengadu dekat Allah in your doa after solat. At least, that’s what I do. Alhamdulillah, ended my first year in medical school. Now, I’m already a month and a half, past my summer break. And another 1.5 months to go till it ends. I’m back in Malaysia now. Gonna be back to Dublin in mid August, insyaAllah. Hm, heads up! My writing skills have gotten worsen, day by day. Sorry if it bores you to death.  A lot have been going on lately. Never seem to see the end of it. I had a blast, on my first year in RCSI. Met a lot of people, made new friends, yet, I still am the socially awkward, introverted person, okay. That fact doesn’t change. I’ve been going out of my comfort zones, a few times. And I thank god for that, for giving me the courage to do it! It does improve my communication and hearing, i...
Post a Comment
Read more